Posts Tagged "feelings"

Living under these rules can also lead to a chronic sense of failure, indecision, shame, and increased criticism of others.  The perfectionist is rarely satisfied with their performance.  By setting unrealistic standards the perfectionist develops a harsh self critical attitude which contributes to a low self esteem and fear of negative social evaluation (others will not accept me or like me).  They tend to overgeneralize, feel out of control which spirals down to a sense of helplessness. Therapy includes helping the perfectionist reframe negative self-talk and “rules” that have been established about perfection (I must be perfect, You must be perfect). It can also be helpful to understand how and why these rules were put into place to begin with. ...

Now that I have your undivided attention….a recent study published in Cognitive Therapy Research investigated the differences between individuals with and without sexual dysfunction on the automatic thought content (WAYTY–here and forever more known as What Are You Telling Yourself) during sexual activity.  Results indicated that both men and women experiencing sexual dysfunction (loss of libido, inability to reach orgasm or achieve erection) report significantly more negative thoughts during sexual activity compared to sexually healthy individuals.  Women experiencing sexual dysfunction engage in self talk and cognitions that most often include the following; “I’m not satisfying my partner,” “I’m not getting turned...

Over the millennia, dreams have made a profound impact on life and history. Dreams may have served as the germinating seed for art, myths, “fairy-tales,” architecture, poetry and music. Fascination with dreams has been recorded by Mesopotamians, Hebrews, Babylonians, Chinese, Greeks and Romans since ancient times. Dreams have always played a critical role in world religions from Buddhism, Hinduism, Islam, and in Judeo-Christian beliefs. It is well documented that native and aboriginal religions integrate dreams with all of nature. Despite the attention given to dream interpretation throughout history and the landmark work contributed by Freud, Jung, and others, only a small percentage of mental health professionals work with dreams today in a...

Fear, anxiety, depression, and unhappiness are common among our society today. Many people who suffer with these negative moods may come to believe their personal happiness is dependent on situations and events outside of one’s control and are usually focused on past events or future worries. If “they” had not hurt me, then I could be happy. ” If I had not made the mistakes in the past, I could be content today.” “I’m so worried about my future, I have no peace in my life.” “If only…” Eckhart Tolle in his book entitled A New Earth Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose, says that the joy of Being, which is the only true happiness, cannot come to you through any form, possession, achievement,...